I can’t get past what Jesus envisioned this whole thing called “church” to be.

Divine Presence within Community | “For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” - Matthew 18:20

Embodied Love | “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:34-35

Calling Out and Into | ^“Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” Matthew 28:19-20

Invitation | “Come, follow me…” Mark 1:17

Servant-hearted | ^“Jesus called them together and said, “You know that those who are regarded as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:42-45

The invitation of Jesus to follow and embody the Way is beautiful. So, it begs the question, when we gather as a community for a church gathering, what is it we are composing? Does it resonate with the invitation of Jesus, or has it become something other?

I do not claim to have the answers, but I do want to offer us considerations. In every micro-decision and conversation, ministry leaders are pointing the needle in a particular trajectory. Does that trajectory align with what Jesus meant for the church to be? If so, awesome! If not, let’s prayerfully discern the invitation for our communities.

If you’d like to join the conversation and consider deeply what is being built in our modern churches these days, please head over to amazon.com to pick up your copy of Composing Church: Considerations for the Modern Creative Leader today.

Let’s keep composing well!

In the best of situations, you scratch and find a culture of healthy teammates who:

• work within their strengths.

• encourage one another.

• practice Matthew 18 when there is a conflict to resolve.

• execute worship services out of an authentic overflow of a rich inner life.

When I got into ministry, this is what I pictured it would be like. How about you?

Often though, when I scratch the surface of a community, at least one of the following is taking place. I find churches:

• wondering if their creative arts leader will quit.

• frantically filling holes with contract worship leaders or musicians.

• questioning what the vocalist who is leading a song might choose to say on microphone before they sing.

• wondering when the sermon slides will come.

• preparing for whatever directional bomb a teacher/speaker might communicate on Sunday that dictates where the church is headed.

Why do things like this happen? What causes a fragile and fragmented church culture? A few reasons might exist, such as:

• Soul care has not been prioritized. Thus,

  • Ministry leaders are burnt to a crisp.

  • The lack of soul care has cultivated a shallow/externally-focused culture.

• There is a void of vision. What results is:

  • A swarm of passionate visionaries filling the void with what they believe should be the direction for the church.

  • A diluted culture, murky metrics and inconsistent messaging.

  • Triangulation. Lots and lots of triangulation.

When we compose church, yes the external matters, but may we not neglect the deep layers of internal dynamics. If you are a congregant and the Sunday service seems pretty great, praise! That’s awesome. Will you still pray for those you see on stage and in the production booth? Pray for healthy relational dynamics. Pray for your leaders as they discern God’s voice in seeking what God is calling the community to be about. Pray for rhythms of rest. You matter in the composition of your church.

Your prayers matter, your voice matters, your presence matters.

May we seek to uphold with care, the ones who are pouring out week after week.

Composing Church: Considerations for the Modern Creative Leader releases on June 14, 2026 on Amazon. It would be a joy and a deep honor if you consider partnering with this work. Please share this resource with a leader who is seeking to compose kind, transparent, Jesus-centered church cultures. Thank you!

www.beckyykema.com

Those of us who stand on church stages and sing, speak or play instruments, feel a particular pressure to perform these days. To be bigger, brighter, and yes, better than the church down the road.

Have we strayed from what Jesus wanted the church to be?

If you’ve ever asked these questions, I wrote this book for you.

Composing Church: Considerations for the Modern Creative Leader is a book of themes and stories from the myriad of church contexts I’ve had the honor of serving.

In it, I do not offer a formula or ‘how to’ list, but rather very intentional considerations for you and your teams.

If you feel like more like a prop than a person, or more like a marionette than a minister, I invite you to join the conversation. Let’s compose something new!

Ways to Engage

1. Join the Book Launch Team! It would be an honor to have you on this core team. Click the link to learn more about partnership and the gifts you'll receive.

2. Tell a friend who might benefit from this content.

3. Pray for this content to provide hope, courage and comfort to current and former church creative leaders in all kinds of contexts.

4. Get the word out on June 14th when the book releases on Amazon!

With immense gratitude,

While the Sunday school answer, “Jesus” ought to always be the answer to the question, “who guides your path, Becky?,” truthfully I have often looked to strong declarative leadership to put a stamp of approval on my trajectory. This has looked like:

• Kings within kingdoms.

• Pastors within churches.

• Supervisors within organizations.

• Teachers within classrooms.

• Parents within households.

• Boyfriends within relationships.

Always some sort of king within some variety of kingdom. And no, this “king” does not equate only to men. It has been filled by anyone with stature, position, power, ego (hello!) or at least a strong voice of influence. Kings within their kingdoms.

In the past 4 years of being a fractional worship leader, using a more specialized set of gifts to partner with various churches, I have wondered about the framing of king and kingdoms in my life. To be specific, who is my pastor? Which is my church? Who do I belong to?

I love a few particular houses of worship for various reasons, such as:

• Kind theology.

• Friendship.

• The very real sense of sanctuary.

• Passionate expressive congregation.

• Multiculturalism.

• The way they love God and honor people.

The loyalist part of me has wrestled with naming a few houses as my spiritual home. But when I hold these questions before God and specifically ask for answers, the following has come clear as a bell.

Who is my king? Jesus. He is my friend, guide, Savior, and true north star. I answer to him.

What kingdom do I belong to? The body of believers.

Where do I worship? There are no walls to where I worship God, and my aim is to do so in Spirit and in truth (John 4:19-24).

Who is my family? Many. Chosen and cultivated from many parts of my story forming a web around me, a hedge of prayer, laughter and support. Some blood relatives, many kin from other lineages but our stories have woven us together and enfolded us to one another.

Little kings and little kingdoms will someday fall away, but there is one King who will never leave, never forsake, and is good to the core.

Jesus.

: the state or fact of being close to or connected with someone or something : close association or proximity

As a four-year old, I found and fell in love with Jesus. Jesus as shepherd and comforter. Captivated by a small Psalm 23 painting in my room of Jesus holding a lamb, walking by a stream and trees within a valley, he seemed so gentle, kind and available. Jesus invited the little children to come to Him, extending arms of welcome out. No guardrails, no barriers, no membership cards, just welcome. “Come to me! Let’s hold hands and we can tell each other stories,” I’d imagine Him say.

Somewhere along my journey, lines were drawn and boundaries set between Jesus and me. They were subtle, invisibly creeping their way and shifting my framing of us.

——>

Although I loved Jesus dearly at 4, I was denied communion until I had gone through particular classes at age 12-13. I cried into my dad’s side one Sunday morning because I could not partake.

—————>

Behavior modification and doing the right thing became a prominent narrative. The focus shifted to performing Jesus for others (aka. be a light). I did this well, but became more focused on those efforts than holding His hand and sharing stories.

————————————>

My sinful shameful depravity that —separated—> me from Jesus, the Holy, Sacred Other. How could I have done this to Him? I don’t deserve Him.

—————————————————>

The intellectualization and theologizing of my relationship with Jesus and the person He is, took hold particularly in Biblical and Theological Studies in college and throughout my Masters of Divinity program.

—————————————————————>

Jesus became the topic to my thesis and subsequently the theme of my worship sets. I programmed around Him and on behalf of Him, but not so much for Him.

————————————————————————————>

My faith crisis when we faced a very scary health situation and I unexpectedly found the floodboards of faith crumble beneath me as I fell like Alice down, down, down to a small dark cavern.

But there, friends. There, I found Jesus. He sat with me for a couple years, within the deep cavern of my heart. Face to face, sitting on opposite ends of a dark room with a light from above shining down on us. Jesus was with me in my darkest hours.

Of course He was.

Over the past 5-7 years of rediscovering Him, Jesus has been so kind. A friend and companion. The boundary lines that invisibly drew me from His nearness vanished, and there we were. Face to face, in the deep cavern of my heart.

As I write, we are in the season of Lent, and with·​ness has taken on a new dimension. As Jesus has sat with me, walked with me, laughed with me and wept with me, we have the opportunity to do this with Jesus on his journey toward the cross.

Here are a couple ways that we collectively can practice the with·​ness of Jesus in this season.

• Read through Luke 22-23. As you prayerfully read through the story, where can you find yourself in it? Picture Jesus’ face, the voices of the people around, the look and feel of the upper room and garden.

• Be with Jesus in your reading of His experience through the gospels. Ask Him, what was it like?

• Watch/listen to this song by the Brilliance.

• Observe the intimate questions they ask of Jesus in song. What do you want to ask Jesus, as you stand with Him along His journey to the cross?

As Jesus continues to be with us, may we have an openness to enter into this season with Him on His journey too.

"Community is like a large mosaic. Each little piece seems so insignificant. One piece is bright red, another cold blue or dull green, another warm purple, another sharp yellow, another shining gold. Some look precious, others ordinary. Some look valuable, others worthless. Some look gaudy, others delicate. We can do little with them as individual stones except compare them and judge their beauty and value. When, however, all these little stones are brought together in one big mosaic, portraying the face of Christ, who would ever question the importance of any one of them? If one of them, even the least spectacular one, is missing, the face is incomplete. Together in the one mosaic, each little stone is indispensable and makes a unique contribution to the glory of God. That’s community, a fellowship of little people who together make God visible in the world."

If I am honest, this is a concept familiar to my ears which have heard such language over the span of a lifetime in being a follower of Jesus. It shows up in various ways, such as all of us being different but necessary parts of one living bodily organism. Or a mosaic, such as is written above. Different parts, jobs, all needed.

But something in this hearing struck my ears afresh and traveled down into the caverns of my heart.

Truthfully, the past four months have been a time of confusion and disorientation in my life. Ever had a season like that? I do not recommend.

It completely caught me off guard. I found myself more or less grounded by Jesus. A surprise sabbatical if you will, not one I asked for or had planned for as a person who makes their living contract by contract, yes, by yes, by yes.

It sent me into a bit of a tailspin. Do I still fit somewhere in this mosaic? I once felt like I squarely knew my hue and shine. I proudly took up space within the great grand mosaic. But as the plate tectonics unexpectedly shifted, I wondered if my little stone had been rattled and shaken off, or perhaps plucked off by a crowbar and kicked around on the ground.

Sitting on the last day of the Pastors, Priests & Guides Retreat, Nina spoke of this Nouwen quote and the Spirit of God used it to draw me back. Like,

“Hey look, sweetheart! You do have a place here still. Your little stone hasn’t been plucked off. It’s been scuffed up a bit, but you are still here, a part of My family, a part of the whole, just as you always have been.”

And so, just as I received encouragement from a familiar metaphor, I want to encourage you. If you feel at all like you don’t have a place or have lost your place within the great grand mosaic, be encouraged that you have not been dropped. You have not been plucked from God’s mosaic. You are loved and not alone. And together our individual parts can shine brightly, making God visible in the world.

Our version went like this:

^“Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread and forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. For thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever, amen.”

Daily bread. As a child of middle class privilege, this was an easy phrase to lap from my lips without a thought or care. Daily bread, of course! Gosh, in our household, it was daily bread of broccoli or breaded fish sticks or any number of things that I wish could magically poof their way off my plate without having to ingest any of it. Too much daily bread over here, God! Please remove the “icky” bread.

As a human now squarely in the middle stage of life, daily bread has taken on a far more rich and hearty undertone. Daily bread has looked like:

• a contract being signed, and the assurance of income for a couple months.

• a friend reaching out at just.the.right.moment when I felt the floorboards of my world crumbling beneath my feet.

• an unexpected Starbucks gift card, providing a moment of delight.

• small but oh so meaningful prayers being answered. Like, the kind of answered prayers that make you remember there is a loving God who sees you and knows you more than you know yourself.

• a loved one saying, “I forgive you. Let’s try again.”

This morning as I prepared my heart to lead worship at church, daily bread came to mind. God has provided daily bread in a vast amount of ways over the years. More than likely, there are a million ways God has done so that I have not been attuned to seeing, hearing, feeling and appreciating.

How many moments of provision are afforded us that we don’t take into account?

Where I attend church and occasionally get to lead worship, we receive communion (or Eucharist) each week. As a little band of kin, we pause to partake as a group before going out to facilitate worship. We are reminded every week that Jesus said “this is my body (the bread of life), broken for you.”

Bread of Life

Life-giving sustenance

The source of the Divine offered to us as often as we wish to partake.

Daily bread.

How grateful I am today for the millions of ways Jesus shows up and provides daily bread.

God, grant us the humility to cup our hands each day, opening to what comes our way, and receiving from our Life-Source, Jesus, daily bread. Amen

.

My heart sinks and my spirit leans in every time some iteration of this sentiment is spoken to me. And this is common, friends! There is much that goes into worship leading such as having the abi

lity to bend an ear toward the band and an ear toward heaven, discerning in real time what the room needs. It takes an earnest heart, wise spirit, musical skill, and a personal faith in the God whom you are singing to. But speaking? Speaking is something we can certainly develop.

As a ministry coach, I give voice to the vocalists who seek to go beyond a song-leader and try worship leading. If you or someone you know finds themselves wanting to hone this skill, let me begin to demystify it for you.

YOU CAN DO THIS. Pull out a piece of paper and grab a pen.

For starters, we must begin by knowing our blocks and barriers.

• What feelings are stirred when you imagine yourself speaking on mic?

• Are there messages of fear or doubt that you hear when preparing to do so?

• Sink in deeper and get quiet.

  • Ask God, when did I first start feeling a block around this area of speaking on microphone?

  • Trust your memory to guide you as you hold this before God. Write down whatever comes to mind. Moments, things spoken over you, anything.

  • Ask for God’s loving-kindness to meet you as you review what blocks and barriers exist.

When we can name and identify the blocks and barriers, and where they came from, we can then begin the careful work of addressing them.

It would be a privilege to support your growth as you or a friend work through these barriers so that we may give voice to the vocalists.

Let’s connect and explore how to set your voice free.

With Love,

Becky

https://www.beckyykema.com/

The formula worked like a great chemistry experiment. A dash of high energy 3-4 minute songs, carefully removing the 6 repeated bridges from the recording, an impactful creative spoken word with video projection on the wall or an 8-minute theatrical sketch that included laughter and then a real heart string tug, coupled with a reflective question with padding underneath, and landing into an explosion of passionate performative music that shifted into a corporate praise chorus.

I have pondered it a great deal over the years. It is not all good and not all bad. There are redemptive pieces and useful creative tools to implement. But many times we were so focused on the energy arc within the room, that we missed a crucial question in vetting our material. How were we forming people in those moments?

Were we drawing them into a deepening understanding of how dearly they are loved by God? Perhaps sometimes. Were we introducing them to the richness found in exegeting a word from the original Greek? Were we broadening their understanding and ability to hold the mystery of the Trinity - God three in one? Were we cultivating curiosity, gratitude, devotion? Were we cultivating consumeristic Christians?

Years later, I found myself on the other side of the 52-weekend schedule of serving in megachurch. I began to discover smaller communities and pockets of people committed to soul care and spiritual formation. The size and scale mattered less, the heart work seemed to matter a great deal.

One of these beautiful offerings that has been a gift to me has been participating within the Pastors, Priests & Guides Retreats. This community was formed by a leadership team who knew how to do the big and spectacular well, and longed to create something that moved from formula and more toward formation.

If you have ever been curious in attending, please do yourself a favor and click the link below now. PP&G is an ecumenical gathering where you will receive rest, Scripture reflection, a place to be still and hold very intentional questions before God in prayer. You have a handful of opportunities this year and the first one is soon! Come give yourself an opportunity to slow down and listen. While formula matters, please allow space for personal formation by attending one of these gatherings this year.

https://pastorspriestsandguides.com/

This winter break was one of the best for the Ykema family, of which I am immensely grateful. Christmases past had been marked with crash landing into the holidays after a 10-12 Christmas service run. Other Christmases were marked with a loved one in the hospital and holding deeply dreadful unknowns about the future. This one, thank God, was blissfully boring.

In a spur of the minute decision, Nathan and I decided to pack up the kids and drive a few hours into the Rocky Mountains to stay at a cozy and snowy remote cabin in the woods. Accompanied by a hot tub, because, winter. We weren’t quite aware of how remote this place was until about 2.5hrs into the drive, when houses became fewer and far between and the windy roads turned from concrete to 20 miles of snowy dirt road. Our electric sedan was in for its first off-roading experience!

About 5pm on a wintry evening, we were rapidly chasing sunlight as we wound our way westward toward this illusive cabin. Our pace quickened. My fists gripped my coat in the left hand and door handle in the right. I closed my eyes trying to not imagine us spinning off into a ditch and freezing to death.

Chasing sunlight.

There is a thrill to it, no? The quickening of heartbeat, racing and chasing the last remaining glimmers of the sun’s rays before the eyelid of the sun closes on the horizon, only to awaken on the other side of the planet. Chasing sunlight. We chase it in so many ways.

• Squeezing the very last gooey drops of delectable frosting as you decorate cookies.

• Picking up your pace with renewed energy for the final few minutes of a race.

• Lingering in the late moments of the night in company of a loved one who is about to say goodbye.

• Singing at the top of our lungs at a karaoke night and leaving behind any ounce of humiliation or tempered behavior as you simply go for it!

• Chasing sunlight through the sky as you drive west.

What if we chose more chasing sunlight moments? How might our perspective change? What gifts might we receive by being so present to the current moment, soaking in every ounce of goodness that it offers?

I am curious to this concept. May my eyes be opened to more and more ways to chase sunlight every day.

At the start of December in the suburb where we lived, the celebration of Hanukkah often came first. The town streets would light up with blue and white lights. On the lampposts one would find Stars of David donned in bright shiny tinsel. My eyes would catch a display in a storefront window of a dinner table displaying a lighted menorah and perhaps a game of dreidel and chocolate golden coins stacked up high. With my nose pressed up against the icy window and hot breath exhaling fog clouds upon the glass, I was curious, eager to learn more, struck with wonder.

A week or so would pass, and the blue and white would turn to green and red. The window display would turn from a Hanukkah haven to a Christmas Cathedral. Inside those window displays would be a winter wonderland. Tiny lights danced around a voluptuous fir tree. Large boxes wrapped in bold plaid paper draped the floor of this Christmas window display.

The gift of the window shopping was found in the way that it engaged my imagination with awe and wonder. In this same way, today let us peek with our own eyes into the window of two particular narratives within the story of Jesus’ birth. The story of the Magi traveling from far to bring gifts to Jesus, but first, the moment of Mary’s song in the Bible.

An angel has come to Mary and let her know she will be with child and that child will be the Messiah, our Savior. She was found favorable in God’s sight, wow. She then goes to visit her relative Elizabeth who is pregnant with John, who we will later know as John the Baptist. As Mary enters Elizabeth’s home, she doesn’t say a word before Elizabeth is proclaiming that Mary is with child and that child is the Savior.

Mary is surprised by Elizabeth breaking her own news, the secret that Mary has been holding. But Elizabeth knows it as Mary enters the room. In an exclamation of outward confirmation that this inner transformation was happening, Mary sings the following song:

Luke 1:46-55 NIV

And Mary said:

“My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has been mindful of the humble state of his servant. From now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me— holy is his name.

His mercy extends to those who fear him, from generation to generation. He has performed mighty deeds with his arm; he has scattered those who are proud in their inmost thoughts. He has brought down rulers from their thrones but has lifted up the humble. He has filled the hungry with good things but has sent the rich away empty. He has helped his servant Israel, remembering to be merciful to Abraham and his descendants forever, just as he promised our ancestors.”

Mary cannot help but sing, praise, declare something of what has happened to her. The fulfillment of prophecies and promises. She has seen them, she is a part of them. Mary is struck with awe and wonder.

Now let’s take a peek into the story of the Magi visiting the Messiah. Quick recap. Evil King Herod heard that a baby boy was born who would be king, and feeling the threat of this, he sent the Magi to go find the baby and report back to Herod.

Matthew 2:9-12 NIV

After they had heard the king, they went on their way, and the star they had seen when it rose went ahead of them until it stopped over the place where the child was. When they saw the star, they were overjoyed. On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasures and presented him with gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. And having been warned in a dream not to go back to Herod, they returned to their country by another route.

The Magi had long awaited the fulfillment of a prophecy. They waited in faith, with eyes wide open to the movement of the stars and an eye attuned to find the Divine. Upon the sight of Jesus, they bowed down and worshiped. They gave him gifts and then protected him by going home another way.

Let’s pause here and press our faces against the window to get a better look at the word, Adoration. Adoration is a big word that can often feel nebulous, ethereal, out there. We kind of know what it means but not really.

I first went to Merriam Webster and here’s what she had to say to me.

Adoration: the act of adoring : the state of being adored. (Thanks, Merriam.)

I dug further into more resources and discovered this.

Adoration: deep love and respect; worship or veneration.

Etymology: The word is derived from the Latin “adorare”

(1) "to speak to,"

(2) "to beseech," "entreat,"

(3) "to do homage," "to worship"

Adoration is an action-oriented word. That action can take many forms.

-It can elicit a verbal reaction like songs of praise, or a shout.

-It can elicit a physical reflexive act like seeing a loved one on the street, running to them and embracing.

-Adoration can elicit tears, outpoured in praise and gratitude.

-Adoration can be offered in the gifts we bring. Like the gift of a meal you bring to a loved one.

-Adoration can also elicit active stillness. That “stop you in your tracks” stillness and silence that comes from being struck by something that takes your breath away.

Adoration is action-oriented. But an action without causation is just empty movement. Adoring something because we’re supposed to is meaningless. It’s law for law-sake. It’s going through the motions. It’s void.

There must be a cause for the effect. The effect is adoration. But is the cause?

Let’s go back to where we started. And I will offer to you a few words that I believe lead us toward adoration.

Awe and wonder.

Awe: A feeling of wonder, fear, and reverential respect.

Wonder: a feeling of surprise, mingled with admiration, caused by something beautiful, unexpected, unfamiliar or inexplicable.

It’s “Wow.” It’s waking up unexpectedly early to the most brilliant sunrise with orange and pinks and blues painted upon feathery clouds. Wow. It’s waiting in line at a coffee shop and discovering someone has paid it forward and your coffee is free. Wow. It’s gazing into a shop window as a kid and being awestruck with wonder. It’s sitting with a loved one in the remaining hours they have on earth and experiencing the sacred thin place where heaven seems to touch earth. Wow.

Friends, when was the last time you experienced awe and wonder?

How did adoration manifest in you?

• Tears? Stunned silence? Shouts of joy? An outpouring of gifts or gratitude?

• Perhaps write it down. Name it.

“The awe of God is the beginning of wisdom.” - Rabbi Heschel

When we meditate on the story of Mary’s realization and the Magi traveling from so far to have an encounter with the Messiah, I think of this quote. The wonder they must have experienced in that moment. Struck silent with awe, to be face to face with the Divine, experiencing the beginning of wisdom.

Awe and Wonder lead to Adoration. May our senses be alert and curious, ready to bear witness to awe and wonder in this season. And may it lead us to the acts of real, reflexive, outpourings of adoration.